Mother F*cking Homemaking: An Homage to JJ Keith
|September 17, 2013||Filled under Uncategorized|
Whenever I look at Pinterest, it’s like I’m looking at this alien world. I had no idea there were people out there who spent so much time making their children’s sandwiches look like Disney characters (then I wonder how it looks when it gets to school….scrambled Disney characters?). Is that like…an every day thing?
It gives me anxiety.
I do realize that no one pins something that’s only adequate, they pin the finest. But when I’m looking at it all, I start getting a complex. It’s like the real Supermom lives inside the screen and she’s taunting me with her Halloween decorations that she made herself out of shit she foraged and then wove together using bark from her trees she planted herself and grew into fort for her kids who stay clean ALL DAY LONG. They do homeschooling in books she bound herself that rest on shelves she made out of old pallets. Usually this triggers both my gag reflex and my guilt button all at the same time.
Recently someone showed me this Pinterest board where the truth has been spoken. This might not be appropriate if your children are around because swear words are about to happen….but they’re just words. In this case these words are very very very very necessary. I wish I had come up with this shit myself.
Let me introduce you to a HILARIOUS genius and her Pinterest board: Mother Fucking Homemaking (sorry for the swears, Grandpa)
I love this too much. This has been my biggest WTF on Pinterest to date: home made baby food recipes. I don’t really know why they’re a thing. Food is food…baby food is just a mushy version of food. Let me give you MY tutorial, it’s only three easy steps.
Step one: Make your family some food.
Step two: Mush it up into a consistency that is suitable for the stage your baby is at
Step three: Feed it to your baby.
You get the point? There’s so much more of these that came from her incredible mind.
This woman is really on to something! My sanity has been restored.
How does Pinterest make you feel about your skills as a mother? How can something be so inspiring and soul crushing at the same time?