My darling Silas,
Today you turned two. It’s such a bittersweet feeling for me. Time flies by so fast, sometimes I get caught up in the excitement of each new thing you do, always excited for the next one. Other times I stop and look back and I hurt for past stages that went by too fast. I miss nursing you so badly sometimes. I wish I could just have you back as a baby and nurse you one more time. I can’t believe the last time we nursed was only eight months ago.
Silas there’s so much I love about you. I can’t even begin to list them as it would take all day and all night. My love for you has completely changed me. My whole world revolves around you and your brother and I love it so much. You’ve blessed me far beyond anything I could imagine, you’ve turned my world upside down.
Not only have you blessed me but you’ve blessed my entire family. I love seeing my sisters drool over you and hearing my mother pinning for you over the phone. Your beautiful life has changed everyone.
When we are cuddling together, reading a book or singing; your soft skin, sweet voice and warm body melt me into a puddle. I love those times with you where we can just cuddle together for so long, sometimes still and quiet and other times we gently play and I tickle your toes. You always make me eat your toe jam.
Right now your play time usually involves trucks. You’re all over the floor, watching the wheels spin and babbling along in your own language or singing whatever song is in your head. Watching you push them along makes you look so big. You also enjoy making anything into a telephone and having quick conversations with Grandma. You’re always noting the temperature of everything, it’s either “bery hot” or “colllllld”.
When out in public you make everyone smile, saying hi to everyone and telling them you love them. It’s remarkable how friendly you are. I love how children are so quick to be friendly and so slow to judge people. I hope I can teach you to stay like that.
The way you enjoy music makes me so proud. My world has always involved music and seeing you excelling in it and enjoying it makes my day every day. Your singing has brought tears to Mommy and Daddy’s eyes before. Your voice is so sweet and your winked brow is so precious when you’re really singing seriously. The way you can remember songs constantly amazes me, I just can’t get enough of it. Your Daddy and I met because of music, it’s so great you’re carrying on with the passion.
It’s amazing how you can drive me SO crazy, to the point of complete frustration and then ground me again with a cute word, kiss, or cuddle. It’s a good thing you’re so sweet, God was smart making you that way. I really do wish that I didn’t get so frustrated with you. I’m working on it baby. We’re learning together now aren’t we?
Every night I come into your room before I go to bed. Sometimes I just sit and stare and your precious face, sometimes I cry and sometimes I just crawl on in and hold you. Sometimes I wish I could just stay in that moment forever. I have to tear myself away from you and get myself to bed. But there’s nothing like sitting there with your Daddy and watching you sleep.
Seeing you with your Daddy makes me so happy. Watching you two play or cuddle, hearing you giggle. Your love for each other means so much to me. He’s so special to you right now, you never want him out of your sight once he gets home. The poor guy hardly has a chance to shower, but he doesn’t mind. He loves you so much.
So, my Silas; my heart; my love, you are now on your way to being three. So much of me wants to pause this time, make you stay little just a bit longer. But you’re going ahead without me, learning and changing and growing. Soon you’ll be talking about everything, understanding new things, becoming more of a person and more of a boy. I’ll just be dragging along behind you, trying to adjust to each new phase you grow into.
I love you so much my boy, thank you for blessing my life.
You and Daddy when you were first born
you and Daddy at your second birthday party