Inspirational Memes Are Trying To Kill Us All

I need to talk about something and I don’t think I am alone here. If I am, this blog is going to look very peculiar to you…so my apologies. So, you know those inspirational memes people share around? You know, the ones with the calming backgrounds and the trendy fonts? They stress. me. the. hell. out.

They’re filled with so much JUDGEMENT. Brent says that the memes aren’t actually judging me and it’s my own insecurities that are causing me to have an emotional reaction, but Brent is human and he makes mistakes so we can’t really trust him, can we? There’s also this giant sense of urgency, like death is HAPPENING right now so we gotta like DO ALL THE THINGS! ACQUIRE ALL THE SUCCESS!! BECOME ALL THE FITNESS!!

Why are memes so obsessed with death? Maybe they’re made by serial killers who feel a little bit guilty that they’re going to kill one of us tomorrow, so they’re trying to get us to have a good day. NOT WORKING, serial killers. Find a new tactic.*

I also need to point out that a lot of us are super happy being completely ordinary. If Brent and I were motivated by money and “success”, then we would have a LOT of both. We like simplicity. That’s A-okay, folks. Fortunately we are motivated by Mario Kart, alcohol, and Netflix so we’re going to die happy because we have all of those things.

It’s not all of them, it’s the ones that talk about how you’re not actually living your life to the fullest. I shall share a few with you and give you my interpretation.

 

Exhibit A:

This one has a disappointing white background but the bold letters speak loudly. This reads “You’re mediocre and you watch too much Netflix, you should probably be spending every last second squeezing fun out of your day because you’re hella close to dying and you kind of suck…actually you suck quite a lot.”

 

“You’re insanely mediocre and you probably will never climb a high mountain or be rich. You can’t sit with us.”

 

“Eat lots of chocolate except that will make you gain weight and then you won’t be happy because you can’t fit into your jeans so what’s even the point?”

 

“Oh crap, my muffin top is screaming at people again, he’s such an asshole. Plus, now everyone knows that I’m worried my armpits smell and that I’m secretly wondering why they hate me. They probably don’t even notice my new boots which I’m feeling SUPER confident in. FML”

 

I think you get the gist of it now. Basically someone created these memes to hurt your feelings. Everyone partake in being offended now.

I thought I would be SUPER nice and make some better memes for you, you won’t have to read between the lines at all.

 

Exhibit B:

Simple as that. Take the lame out of your game, ya goose.

 

 

They grow up so fast so WHY AREN’T YOU A PERFECT PARENT?

 

Seriously.

 

Do better y’all.

 

 

Basically a piece of filth in the dustpan of the universe.

 

Don’t you feel super good about yourself now? I sure hope so. I’m motivated AS HELL. I’m sure it’s very clear to you now why inspirational memes want you to die. SOON. QUICK! Go dust your baseboards!!!

 *sorry if you’re an inspirational meme maker and aren’t a serial killer. I didn’t mean it, I promise.