Rain Rain Go Away

Ugh, the dreaded winter time here in the Lower Mainland…rain rain rain.  I can’t complain about the fall we’ve had, it was mostly beautiful.

I was pretty proud of myself and how much I got the kids out this summer, even if it was just in my yard some days, they got outside.  Now it’s gloomy, cold, muddy, wet, soggy, gross…etc.  I don’t WANNA go outside…at all….

Now there many indoor places to go to like the mall, grocery store, etc…but I have THOSE kids, you know..the ones that scream and wail and hit and snot and slobber??  Those are mine…wait…THAT is mine…not mentioning any names…*cough* Silas *cough*.  Brent and I hardly can handle the pair of them on our own let alone me by myself.  It’s a nightmare…and absolute nightmare.  I never want to do it…ever.

A few weeks ago I had the bright idea of sticking Ikey in the backpack and holding Silas’ hand to go for a walk.  6 months ago that was a fine idea but now it’s almost impossible.  I had to stop at least 10 times to calm him down.  He just flips out about everything.  It’s so hard to handle.

I had great plans to enroll them in some programs but POOOP we don’t have the money for that.  We eat lentils 3 nights a week…we can’t afford PROGRAMS.  We afford legumes…we smell too bad for programs anyway.

So here I am, feeling like a bad mother…again.  Even though I’ve realized that I always feel like a bad mother and wife no matter what I do or do not do.  Maybe that’s why I never accomplish much…because I never really impress myself with my accomplishments anyway…hmmm wonder where THAT came from?  Haha.

Anyway…I rabbit trailed.  Can someone buy us a bit plastic bubble with fake sunshine and warmth so we can go outside??

2 comments

  1. No mother feels like a great mother 100% of the time. Every one of us feels like a failure because that’s what mom due. I think that’s why it’s called “mommy guilt”

  2. Dear Leah you’re being too hard on yourself…try to think back to a time resently when you felt like a good mother…when you had abit of fun with the boys ,when you took good care of you sick husband, when you cooked tthem all a good meal. Ilove you .

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