Closet Co-Sleeper

I have a confession to make. I’ve always thought that co-sleeping wasn’t for me, I’ve always thought that it was rather dangerous and it was spoiling your child.  But I do confess that these past 4 months I’ve become a full fledged co-sleeper.  It just crept up on me and now these last few weeks I just take Isaac to bed with me because I know he’s going to end up there anyway.  It started with me just bringing him in there with me in the mornings for a nurse.  Once we moved in here I tried being up with him to nurse at night but we had no shades on the windows and I was scared to come downstairs and find someone peering in the windows at me.  Most nights I tell myself that I’m going to get up and nurse him and stick him in his own bed but now my bed has become his bed.  He takes naps in there and everything.  I’m a co-sleeper, a closet co-sleeper and still don’t even think it’s the best thing for the baby or the family.  I just think Mom and Dad need some break time to “connect” and just be away from the kids.  I also think that kids in a loving family who are raised going to bed in their own bed have a good solid sense of confidence.  Take Silas, he plays in his pitch black room until he falls asleep, confident kid, never slept with Mommy.

Anyway, once Isaac actually has his crib put together I’m going to make him sleep in it.  Or so I say.  I can’t put such a fat child in a bassinet, it just seems wrong.

Am I a bad mother if I start putting Isaac on his tummy to sleep?  I think he’s out of the SIDS scare age, he’s strong and healthy and he sleeps like a gem on his tum tums.  I think he’s out of his swaddle too…he doesn’t like it anymore I don’t think.  Sometimes wrapping him up in it gets him to nurse better though…for some reason.

My brother stopped by last night on his way to work in Whistler.  I made him supper and we had a good visit.  We had steelhead with my special fish sauce, cous cous and swiss chard.  I really do like swiss chard, just stick it in your frying pan with a little soya sauce and it takes like 1 minute to cook and it’s not bad tasting at all (sooo good for you).  I sure love my brother, he’s such a sweetie.  He emptied and filled our D/W for us.   He also emptied some very frightening Tupperware containers that had been in my fridge for a while and then left to warm on the counter all day.  One of them made his eyes water, it was funny.

I guess I have a lot to talk about cuz I didn’t blog for two days.

Today I’m cleaning like a madwoman.  I finally feel better.  Turns out I had a fever for five whole days.  It’s finally gone this morning and I can do a happy dance.   I’ve been doing laundry and dishes and sweeping and on and on. I washed a cushion cover on my couch and now it’s a lighter color than the rest of the couch.  I hope that’s because I washed it on hot to get all the oils from my bmilk out so the color faded rather than the rest of the couch being THAT filthy.  Yikes.  I think I should wash the rest too.  I will when all the clothes are done.

Anyway, I’m going to go upstairs and start folding like a good wife (pffft) or maybe just so all the clothes don’t end up on the floor again.

16 comments

  1. I would be very careful with the tummy sleeping, specially if it’s in your bed. You don’t want to risk anything. On my parenting forum a mom just lost her 4 months old from putting him on his tummy in her bed.

  2. Okay I’m a lurker and sometimes commenter and I get the feeling I should just SHUT UP but SIDS is sort of an interest of mine. Two babies in my husband’s family (immediate and extended) have died of SIDS and I’m not entirely convinced that it is not hereditary. Call me crazy. Anyways, I found this information (http://www.babymattresscovers.com/) a while ago and verified it with a mother friend in New Zealand who says Dr. Sprott’s work is common and legitimate knowledge out there.

    Just thought I’d share. Anytime SIDS comes up I feel like people should know about this and decide for themselves. Maybe you already knew… but just in case you find it useful there you go.

  3. Thanks Debbie. I kind of believe that too. I think if your baby is healthy and the environment is healthy then it most likely wont die of SIDS. I know a lot of babies have died in different countries from toxic mattresses. I just bought Isaac a Sealy…or Simmons…not sure…but I’m sure it’s safe. His cover is Wal Mart Brand. Do you think that’s ok?

  4. I’ve co-slept with my youngest for the past 27 months. We recently moved her into a big bed in her own room, but she still gets up and walks into our room each night. I wouldn’t say that kids who co-sleep lack self-confidence. Above all, I want my kids to know that I am available day or night and if that means coming in for a nighttime snuggle, so be it. My middle child never co-slept, but he had a rather complicated bedtime routine and didn’t sleep through the night until he was well past three. My oldest never co-slept and was sleeping through the night at three months. I think you have to do what is right for the child and, especially, what is right for your family.

    About tummy sleeping ~ I wouldn’t do it until you are absolutely positive he can lift and turn his head while on his stomach. Better yet, wait until he can roll over on his own.

  5. I don’t know enough about the technology/causes to comment on which brand of cover should be used. I totally agree about a healthy environment being the most important thing. If the cause is the chemical make up of the crib mattress mingling with fungus or other dirt and moisture related bacteria, I would assume that a clean home, new mattress, and cover that provides some kind of barrier btw. mattress and baby is all you really need.

    You’re a fantastic mom. Your boys are so blessed to be so loved. 🙂

  6. The baby sufficated. He co slept and there were sheets and blankets and pillows everywhere. I didn’t put her on her tummy she would rolled on it. I think toxins have something to do with it, but also babies sleep deeper when they’re on their tummies and thus sometimes forget to breathe. It’s almost like their brain is too asleep to remind them to take a breath. I think that once they roll on their tummies it’s ok to leave them there, but I would be very careful about doing that for them, specially not in their own bed

  7. Co-sleeper, checkin’ in! and all my children are VERY independent~LOL! Now don’t freak out on me~it’s just something I’ve read and heard~but some people think vaccinations are a contributor to SIDS…. (((((HUGS))))) sandi

  8. Co-Sleeper….Check
    Tummy-Sleeper….Check
    Last night I fed baby put him to sleep in his bassinet/playpen thing by my bed on his back…. I kid you not… 2 seconds and he was screaming… I flipped him to his tummy and never heard another peep out of him until his next feeding time (he quit sleeping through the night 🙁 ) The night before I fed him put him in his bed and he screamed so I put him back in my bed on his back and didn’t hear another peep out of him. Guess he knows what he wants and when.

    He doesn’t sleep on his tummy in my bed, but he does in his bed. I make his bed with nothing fluffy so he can sleep on his tummy, which he loves the best. I think he sleeps good on his back in my bed because he eats and then just falls asleep and if you don’t touch him he’s good to go.

  9. Ikey’s always slept on his side. I really think he’s competent enough to sleep on his tummy on a harder mattress. Mine is super soft…he does end up on his tummy sometimes and sleeps oh so lovely. But, I shall keep him on his back or side.

  10. My baby started rolling over at 3 months and he slept on his tummy every night since then. My doc told me that if he can roll himself over then it doesn’t matter so much.
    I refuse to do co-bedding b/c I want that time alone with my husband! Nothing can ruin the mood like a kid between you 😉 But we have made exceptions when Ephram is really sick, etc.

  11. I put all three of my kids on their tummies, I confess. I tried to do what I was supposed to with number one, Maya, but she wouldn’t sleep. She’d just jerk her little arms around until she woke up. The only way she seemed secure was on her stomach. So when the other two showed similar signs of greater comfort on their stomachs, I caved immediately.

    Of course, in Maya’s case, she developed colic at 4 weeks, and then spent the next 4 months sleeping on my stomach. Then I’d wake up and nurse her, and she’d end up on her side, curled up against me.

    I also did sleep with them all. I’d put them on their tummies, put a hand on their little backs and go to sleep. I felt safer that way, with them right beside me (yes, I know – neurotic).

    I did read a fascinating book about the biology of mothering (I forget the title) where the author talks a lot about how sleep clinics have demonstrated that babies who sleep with their parents (in a safe environment) are actually less prone to SIDS, because the mother’s sleep patterns affect the babies’ sleep patterns. The mother basically ‘teaches’ the baby how to sleep properly. With the mom, the baby tends to have more wakeful periods and doesn’t go so deeply into sleep as babies alone. She theorized that babies sleeping alone might go so deeply into sleep they just fail to wake up, whereas babies sleeping with their mothers can’t ever do that.

    Anyway! I figured that if the risks for SIDS were low birth weight, formula fed, smoker in house and lying on stomach, that as long as I was good with the first three, I could get a pass on the fourth.

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