Going to Counseling

So, I’ve done it.  I’ve bit the bullet and I have a counseling appointment this evening with my counselor from 3 years ago.  I really like her :).

Before I got pregnant with Isaac I never thought I would be dealing with depression ever again.  I was doing SO well.  I was even really skinny.  Once I had the unexpected pregnancy and all that other stressful stuff happened I just started going down hill.

I’m just finding myself, after the storm.  I’m realizing that my self esteem has plummeted and I’m tucking myself away in my house and getting more and more antisocial.  It’s always been hard for me to get Silas out of the house but with having Isaac and then the peanut allergy I’ve gotten WAY worse.  These kids are pretty lucky, they have way more than I did at their age.  And I think they get pretty good treatment but I still think they need to get out of the house despite my ability to be perfectly “fine” not stepping foot outside for an entire week.  It’s SO important to not let my mental issues get in the way of how I raise my children.

Anyway, I’ve accepted my issues and now I just want to work through them with someone.  My counseling sessions usually consist of me pretty much figuring it all out  myself…I guess that’s how she does it though, she guides and asks all the right questions.  She does some neato treatments too.  Anyone who’s ever had traumatic experiences should try out EMDR, it’s weird but amazing.

Now that I know I’m messed up, I’m not going to waste time staying like this.  Time to get better for my family so I can be the best that I can be for them.  And for myself obviously.  I just think that I only get to be in my 20’s once, I want to feel good while I’m young.  I want to actually feel young and not haggard.

So that’s that.  I’ll let you know how everything progresses.  I feel better just knowing that I’m going to have some help.  Hopefully I’ll inspire someone else to go talk to a pro.  It truly is a great experience once you find the right person for you.

5 comments

  1. Good Luck! I want to go back to counseling – it was SO awesome having someone to talk to. Problem was… I didn’t care for his way of doing things. He never let me talk, he never asked questions, he’d just say okay today lets work on this subject. It wasn’t getting me anywhere. I left there with a bigger weight on my shoulders thinking Hey I didn’t actually get to tell you anything, you did NOTHING for me. I’m looking for someone else – in our small town we only have one, I didn’t care for her, I was already driving an hour one way to where I was going. I’m still looking for someone semi-close so I’m not driving all damn day. Hope it goes well for you! Happy self here you come!! 🙂

  2. I’m glad for you because 1.you know where to go for help and 2. you’re doing it. You are a smart girl and I’ll be praying for you.

  3. I hope that things work out for you and your children. Your 20’s is a wonderful time and I hope that you get a chance to enjoy it. Good Luck. ; )

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