Stupid Hormonal Feelings.

I’m not sure if I just really mainly dis-like the newborn stage or if it’s just hormones.  I was thinking it took me a long time to love my child but I kind of don’t feel warm towards anyone I’ve noticed.  I think I’m just dealing with hormones.  I hate this though, I hate feeling this way.  I’m a long time sufferer of depression so I hate the feelings of it.  Not that I’m really depressed or anything, I’m just feeling off and I really really hate it.  I’m a person who doesn’t ever get PMS or anything like that so it’s hard for me to accept hormonal feelings.  I really can’t complain though, I don’t feel THAT terrible.  My little Isaac is a dream baby, he only woke up once again last night and he only really cries when I change his bum after waking him up.  He’s wonderful and I feel healthy and well rested already.

I’m really tired of Silas being a pain in the arse when there’s anyone else in the house.  He does it with Brent too, he’s been a total freak all morning.  He just tantrums of the littlest things.  I don’t know what to do about it.  I almost think we’ll just have to wait until we can communicate better.  Usually he’s mad because he’s tired or hungry.  He knows how to ask for food but he just wont, how do I teach him to use his words?  He’s got such a short temper!!

Anyway, I’m just fixing lunch for Brent and I and it’s done so I’m going to eat now.  Hungry!!

3 comments

  1. I have a lot of trouble with newborns, but was unable to give myself that slack. We’re told we’re gonna love them! but come on-they just sit there and eat and crap and sleep. If it was a husband, we’d divorce it.

    It’ll come. My second was a great baby, but I didn’t really love her until well after the 1 year mark. I had my issues, but still. I think it’s asinine that we expect new, tired mother’s to immediately love this needly little thing.

    At least you’re talking about it-many women don’t do even that.

  2. Ya I think we need to talk about it more, that’s why I do. It took me a while to really love Silas too, but I think the weird feelings were over about a month after he was born, I hope that happens again. I think once we’re in a routine for a while it’ll be good again. I just need to know this little one isn’t going to ruin my life. I really hate how a few chemicals can change the way you think sooo much!

  3. Congrats on baby Isaac! (did I say that already? I forget…)
    I just wanted to say to have a little extra mercy on Silas right now. Even though he’s young, he still realizes that he has to share mom and dad now, and he might just be doing whatever he can to get your attention. I know we went through that with The Boy – even though he was 2.5 by then – he still had some major fits over the littlest things for the first … few months even, after Lil’ Miss was born.
    *shrugs*
    I could be way off base…but yeah! There you have it! haha…

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