I was watching a bit of Tyra today while I was nursing Isaac and this woman was bawling about how since she had her kid she’s 20 pounds heavier and has stretch marks. She wasn’t into having sex or anything. That makes me so sad.
I’ve ranted about this before but this pressure put on us mothers to not get a stretch mark and to stay skinny throughout our pregnancies and lose the weight instantly is ABSURD!! It’s stupid!! I used to buy into it and I still have trouble looking at all the pregnant ladies in my church who are sticks with a basketball glued to their tummies and wishing that were me. I’ve been trying and failing at control tops from Wal Mart that either don’t work or I get a wonderful roll on the top on them…yummy.
I’ve really come a long way though. I no longer despise my stretch marks or whatever else birthing a child has bestowed upon my body. And I really really HATE it when people brag that they stayed skinny or they didn’t get a stretch mark. Like that REALLY makes you a better person than I am. Like you’re above me now? Yes the weight gain is partially better will-power but not always. When I had Silas I peed off 30 pounds in a few weeks. It was all water, my fault?? No way. This weight I’m struggling with to get off now? Yes, partially my love love love of pizza and burgers. You’re still not better than me…and I’m not better than you because of it.
There’s so much contempt in the world of motherhood, so much judgment. Then we have to go on feeling bad about our looks. I say ENOUGH PEOPLE!! Embrace everything that comes with being a woman, we grow life, we are strong through pain, we are giving of our bodies. That’s beautiful, and the things left behind are beautiful reminders of the power that our bodies hold.
I was playing around with my camera the other day taking self portraits of Isaac and I. I noticed something fantastic. Look how hot I am…
Ok ya, so you all saw that photo yesterday. Tons of compliments on facebook…I must be perfect…la la la. K but wait, lets try a new angle…
Oooooo ouch Leah. Not so hot now am I? All I did was look down at the camera, same expression and everything. Perhaps there’s a lesson here, a lesson in perspective. I’m really hot if you’re a tall dude, but most short guys think I’m wretched. Ha ha.
I even managed to get a photo where my breasts looked massive, my tummy was invisible, and I looked great…but I wont post it because I have father figures and grandfathers reading that might not appreciate such a photo….
No, the lesson here is women in magazines with their perfect bodies and blah blah blah aren’t only airbrushed, they’re taken at the perfect angles. We all know which angle my photo would be taken at.
Don’t get me wrong, there’s nothing wrong with being skinny. I strive to lose weight because I do think I’ll look better, I’ll look healthier, I’ll be able to dress myself better and I’ll feel better about myself. There’s nothing wrong with wanting to look better as long as you’re being realistic. As long as you’re doing it for your health and happiness, not because you’re obsessed with looking like something you can’t obtain.
It’s beautiful to have massive, muscular thighs, or a larger bum or a long torso with shorter legs or whatever. As long as your healthy inside and out! And even that, my friends, is incredibly relative.
So today take time to feel good about your body, feel good for what your body can do and has done. Stretch marks, saggy boobs, wrinkly tummy skin…or not! We’re women, we’re powerful and we can do miraculous things with our bodies. So celebrate and enjoy yourself because like I’ve said a few times. After having kids, your body is exactly where it’s supposed to be!
I was going to write something, but I’m sure nobody would appreciate me complaining about being too skinny. Even though my nickname has always been toothpick and I will NEVER EVER have boobs. So I won’t complain.
You’re right – healthy is good. Love your body.
Love this post Leah! Thanks for sharing. Since having our third a month ago i’m realizing the body is a little different after three than the first two by this time with the other ones I was back to my old self and this time it’s taking a little longer…oh well I wouldn’t trade my old body for my new baby!
i couldn’t help but notice, is your nose a little crooked? if so, i have the same thing.. and if it’s not.. well now i’ve confessed.
All I have to say is WOOOOOOOOTTTT Leah!!
Way to go, Love this post! It is all so, so true. We all need to love ourselves and our post-baby bodies for what we and they are, beautiful and miraculous! I have my share of strech marks and sagging things, and have issues accepting and loving those bits but like you said, they are beautiful and meant to be that way, every scar!:)
And without the scars, none of us would have our beautiful babies! I hope women will learn to accept themselves and theyre ever-changing bodies in the next generation or so, I pray my daughter will be proud and not asshamed of her body, through out her life, especially after becoming a mother:).
P.S. Thank you aswell for the photos, REALITY eh?? haha! That is awesome, not many of us would have done that I’m sure!:) MUAH!
mommy has tattoos- yes…crooked..runs in the family…thanks Mom. I don’t even notice it on myself.
I like to refer to my stretch marks as Tiger claw scars. That way I don’t even have stretch marks. I’m not in denial am I?? hahaha
That is a good picture of you and Ikey!
Yeah I love that pic of you and Isaac. It has bluish tones to it… how’d you do that?
Even though probably no one will notice this link the day after the post, I wanted to share:
Perhaps you’ve already seen it. I love it – I’m trying to replace the ideals of perfect tummies of celebrity moms with the more realistic, non-surgically enhanced version for when I become a mom.
Warning for the men – some of the photos are nudes.
We have matching crooked noses! Yeah 🙂 Honey you do look hot in that pic – I did that once and my family was all in shock that that was me. In fact… I was in shock. I’ve tried to do it again and I can’t.
Ha ha, nice that you love the pict, the bluish tones come from me fiddling with it on the computer. I didn’t purposely put blue into it though.
Thank you! Whilest I do not have children, I was having self doubt after not fitting ‘well’ into a pair of pants at J.Crew last night (totally not made for those of us with hips and arses). I am glad I came across this, it has reminded me that I am perfect the way I am.
Big thanks 🙂
crooked noses are hot leah!!!
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