He Needs Me?

I like to think that I’ve had a hand in making my son rather independent. He never minds when we leave him with a babysitter or the nursery at church, he keeps himself busy for most of the day without needing me (for playing purposes), he’s not shy, never been a mommies or a daddies boy. Nothing. I took special care to make sure Silas’ life fits into my life, not the opposite. Like if supper needed to be made and he wanted to be held I would hold him when I could and put him down when I couldn’t. I also didn’t demand feed. I think that was part of it (lets not get into a debate here…I know that you can raise children and demand feed). My favorite part of this independence is the mornings when he wakes up, I go in him room and open the blind, throw a bunch of toys in his crib, turn on a Black Eyed Peas CD, turn on the light (I do that last cuz I’m naked and I don’t want people outside to see me) and leave him. yesterday he played for two hours, that means two hours of me SLEEPING. Woot woot!! Yes, I do realize I need to change the CD to something more appropriate soon. I can just see Silas pointing to some woman and saying “lady lumps!!” or something like that!

Now, the only time that being used to this independence of his totally SUCKS is when he’s going through a needy phase. Like he is RIGHT NOW!! AHHHH. See, his needy phase isn’t too bad, but I’m so stinking spoiled with Mr. Independent that I give in to the neediness very begrudgingly. If there’s no fever or no tooth that I can see poking through I have a hard time with it. I didn’t get my extra two hours this morning, he needed me almost right away. I took him into my bed and we had a short cuddle and then he went on to seek new adventures, and awkwardly squish my face while trying to bury his in my hair for a nice long sniff. He did, finally, get how to dismount himself from my bed, he usually just tried to dive off, but he crawled backwards off it today which is a first. Then he cried because he wanted back up, then he crawled backwards off it again, then he tried to dump my Brita filter off my side table, k time to go eat breakfast.

Anyway, I’m sure he’s just teething or something because he’s acting really weird. I had to cuddle him most of yesterday which was nice in its own way, I just had to get over feeling bad for not accomplishing much. Looking forward to another needy day today, perhaps we’ll be able to make it to the park this morning and it’ll cheer the pooper up. Perhaps it’ll cheer me up. I’ve just spend an entire night of trying to fight my husband off my side of the bed, peeing, telling hubby to stop snoring, tending to crying baby, peeing, more fighting, peeing, peeing, crying baby, stop snoring, peeing, etc. Why do we sleep with our husbands again??



Here’s a photo of us, when we got engaged and before I knew of all this misery and Silas was just a twinkle in my eye. Hahaha. Hubby’s cute though right? Silas just noticed the photo and is saying “dada dada!”.


  1. You sound like me right now… 🙂 hehe I told my husband we’re going to look for a new bigger bed this weekend. We used to fit just fine – but him, me, my belly and my extra pillows for support just don’t fit anymore. And as soon as baby is here I’d like to have a bigger bed for those awful nights when baby ends up in bed with us. Hang in there honey… it’s ALL worth it – I swear! My oldest is 8 and I’m diving back into baby world scared and rusty feeling! My 8 year old is SUPER independent and always has been so I know exactly what you’re going thru.

  2. Peace pluckymama,
    I was gonna say the same thing, they have all their lives to be independent…it’s nice to be needed for a minute 🙂 awww…you and your hubby look so cute 🙂 and happy 🙂 you totally have the pre-baby naive happiness on your face 🙂 (j/K)

  3. well there’s always implants 🙂 i swore id never get them, but now i want purkiness back. Maybe after my 3rd one i will

  4. but you gotta admit having big boobies is way fun!!! i liked seeing mine get huge overnight. you should come to my baby shower on the 24th of this month, brad’s grandma is throwing me one

  5. Ya they aren’t so fun when you stop breastfeeding. I wonder how mine will look full of fluid again?? I dunno if surgery will make me totally ok with them. I think I will have to get a lift too because if they sag you need to lift before you enhance….then you get scars, more scars along with all the freaking stretch marks. I went from an A to a DD….my poor pretty lady bits.

  6. no strechmarks for me, mine went from a B to a DD so i understand. No sagging here yet, but im still feeding 🙂

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